The Non-Date That Was

Ok, so as I mentioned someone recently asked me about how to tell if something is a date or not. Which amused me. I generally suck at the whole dating thing. But I didn't think I had been in that particular scenario before. Then either that night or the next morning I remembered. You see, I once went out on a date where I didn't realize it was a date.

Now if I remember correctly this would have been October 2000, just after Canadian Thanksgiving. I had just gotten back to Montreal after my cousin's funeral and plunged right into mid-terms. To place it further in context of the fact that I was probably not my usual self, I had spent three weeks sleeping on a friend's floor because I was homeless, was sick two of those weeks (sinus infection and two different types of ear infections) and less than a week after I moved into my apartment I found out my cousin had died and had to go back home (there was also a road trip to New Brunswick in there too). I had also just broken up with my loser boyfriend of about two years the month before (and he was still calling me and trying to get me to get back together with him...ie being a general pain in the ass). Oh and there was a mess up with my student loan too which meant that I really didn't have any money to buy food for a few weeks (which was fine seeing as I was too stressed out to eat anyway). This time is also known as "The Time of the Seriously Skinny Jeans That Now I'd Be Lucky To Get Over My Knees." I had to buy them because all my other pants were too big. It was a very, very happy day 7 months later when I threw those suckers in the trash. So you know, I had a little bit going on in my life at the time.

There was a guy in one my classes that I chatted with quite a bit. We had a few classes together and we tended to sit together along with a few other people. He was a nice guy. I liked him. But I didn't like him. And I certainly didn't think that he liked me. So when he asked me if I wanted to go see a movie on the weekend when he got back from a camping trip I thought, "Hey, a movie would be great right now after the last few hellish weeks." He knew that I had been out for awhile due to a family emergency and knew what it was so I thought he was just being a nice guy. (Yeah, you'll hear that phrase a few more times...).

And he was. When we met at my apartment (he was literally just getting back from a camping trip and needed to stash his stuff) he brought me what may have perhaps been the most original "date gift" I've ever gotten - he brought me a pumpkin because it was close to Halloween and thought I might want to make a jack-o-lantern (or pie). But I thought that he just being a nice guy.

So we left my place and walked toward downtown and he started to say something about getting something to eat. Um...I ate beforehand. I didn't realize we'd be going out to eat. So we stopped in Chinatown and he just got some takeout. I left kinda bad and had one second where I thought, "Hey, he didn't think....Naaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. That's crazy thoughts."

Then it was about time to go to the movie. I think he tried to pay but I seem to remember not letting him. I think he also tried to buy me snacks and I shot down this one too. Can't remember what the movie was but I hated it and the camera was jumpy and made me nauseous. He liked it and expressed so first so I just said that the jumpy camera gave me a headache and made me feel nauseous. It cut short that conversation. lol But it was sometime between Chinatown and when we left the movie that I seriously started to suspect that I was on a date.

We walked back to my place and talked about why I had been out of classes for awhile and then discussed ritual, etc (hey, we were anthro students). It was a good conversation. Then he picked up his stuff and went to say goodbye and kind of lingered on the double kiss (I was in Montreal remember). But thankfully just barely and since I didn't it clearly meant that nothing was going to happen. After he left I had to sit and think about the evening and then realized that yes, yes I had been on a date.

We still spoke after that but nothing else ever happened. Likely because I ended up at an anthro party with the guy that is referred to around these here parts as The Evil Ex. And since we were clearly together the nice guy gracefully backed off. I later found out that everyone had thought me and nice guy had been dating for months. Huh! Go figure.

Poor guy. He really was nice. I just never thought of him like that.

And that's the time that I went on a date that I didn't know was a date.