Archive for July, 2009

• BlogHer 09: In Real Life

  Date: 2009.07.29 | Category: Blogs, sometimes I ramble | Response: 2

  In Real Life was an appropriate motto for this year’s BlogHer conference, for my experience at least. My online and my real life merged. You see, there are people I know on the internet that are very much part of my real life. People like Denise and Tarrant and their family. They are friends that I’ve known for almost as long as I’ve been online and they opened their home to me even though I brought the Fake Husband with me. (Though I think he’s growing on them, they laughed a lot and the kids seemed to enjoy him.) I hadn’t seen them in almost six years because I suck and I couldn’t get my butt to BlogHer before now. So going into BlogHer I was feeling fantastic about being there and I still got to spend BlogHer with them and the two oldest of the little kids because they were going too.

  The BlogHer conference is what you make of it. Before I went I wrote this:

  I’m expecting to go and learn. I’m expecting to be overwhelmed. I’m expecting to meet fantastic, inspirational women. I’m expecting to hang out with friends, be they people I’ve know for years or people I’ve known for five minutes. I’m expecting to bawl my eyes out at the community keynote. I’m expecting to feel like I’m on the world’s craziest, scariest, most thrilling and exciting amusement park ride. And I’m expecting that the moment it’s over I’m going to be like the child that cries the whole way through and then says, “AGAIN! AGAIN!”

  I was right.

  I learned. I learned more of what works for me and what doesn’t in a session. I learned it’s worth going to a session even though you are worried it might be a bit to “mommyish” for this non-mommy. I learned that I my decision to not really attend any parties aside from the cocktail parties was bang on (though I did end up at the People’s Party).

  I met and reconnected with fantastic, inspirational women. Women like BlogHer’s founders – Lisa, Jory, and Elisa. I proclaimed my love for Susan Getgood on Twitter. I came away from there wanting to be a better writer, a better blogger and a better person.

  I met with friends like the wonderful Lauriewrites, Zandria and Laurie K (Ok, so I don’t have to travel so far to see her, lol). I met Blondie for the first time by walking up to her and saying, “I read your blog all the time but I never comment because I suck at commenting.” Then I found out that people kept thinking that she was me because you know, all redheads look alike. (I kind of wanted to pack Blondie in our car and take her home with us. I’ve adopted her…I’m just not sure she knows it yet.) I met Joy, one of the sweetest women on the planet. Lee and I both got to hang out and have breakfast with Deb Roby.  I gave Suzanne Mars bars. I met a whole bunch of my fellow Contributing Editors at BlogHer (but not all of them who were there which makes me very sad). I met the fabulous book bloggers Florinda and Texas Red.  I had my picture taken with Suebob’s Red Stapler (but alas, not with Suzanne’s stuffed beaver). I know I’m missing a dozen people. I’m sorry. It’s too much to take in and put down on the page.

  I didn’t get to meet everyone I wanted to meet. That sucks, but it is to be expected I suppose. Out of 1500 women I can’t meet them all. (And I kinda suck at the whole meeting people thing, small talk is not something I’m very good at.)

  I saw Paula Deen though I didn’t get to really meet her.

  I bawled my freaking eyes out at the Community Keynote. I’ve never been so happy to remember to pack tissues in my laptop bag. They weren’t all tears of sadness, though some were. There were also tears of happiness, of love and of laughter. The Community Keynote? Those writers remind us of what it is that we do and why we do it. They raise the bar and challenge us to meet it. I swear I’d go back to BlogHer just to attend the Community Keynote.

  BlogHer is indeed the world’s craziest, scariest, most thrilling and exciting amusement park ride. I had highs and lows. I had moments of exhilaration and moments of blind panic where I talked myself out of going back to my room and hiding. There were times that I wished I had gone to more parties and then I smacked myself upside the head and thanked my stars that I hadn’t. There’s nothing wrong with the parties, I just know they would have been too much for me. I sucked at feeding myself meals in the evenings, something that I need to improve on for next year’s BlogHer. Time to start scouting the internet for the best eats at a reasonable price in NYC.

  Because yes, I’m going next year. As overwhelming as it is it is also awesome and it is indeed a ride I want to ride again, and again, and again.

• This Is Not My Post-BlogHer Post

  Date: 2009.07.28 | Category: Health, Uncategorized | Response: 0

  It’s the story of how I do not travel well.

  My body does not like stress. It does not like change. It does not like big changes in eating patterns. When I do any of that it’s like having the Bolshevik Revolution in my digestive system. The drive to Chicago wasn’t so bad. We had a well packed cooler. I didn’t have breakfast before we left and I had slept poorly (something that would continue for the next week). After decided that the ginger pills and ginger ale combination wasn’t working I popped a couple of Gravol, ate a Rice Krispie square and took a 30 minute nap. Somewhere near Ajax we demolished a bag of beef jerky. At a rest-stop near Woodstock I had a hamburger. Lee spent the day working through the leftover (homemade) pizza from the night before. We ate dinner at 11pm that night – Burger King take out. I had three bites of my salad and went to sleep.

  Not a great start.

  The rest of the trip wasn’t bad. We ate dinner with Denise and Tarrant the next two nights, including the night Tarrant made me meatballs and cheese grits because she loves me. (My grits never turn out anything like hers. I think it’s because I’m Canadian and know jack about grits.) Breakfast was pretty stable most of the week – yogurt, juice and coffee. Just like at home.

  Midway through the week something happened. The day before the conference I was sick. Really quite sick. It didn’t stop me from doing too much (including drinking Gold Coasts, which I blame on Megan although I do think that perhaps they helped set me to rights). Things went fairly well during the conference, except that I forgot to plan dinner both nights which resulted in at least one late-night trip to McDonald’s for chicken nuggets because I needed something hot to eat and I needed it now (McDonald’s was the only thing we knew that would be open and knew where it was).

  On the two day drive home I didn’t take so much as a ginger pill. I had half a can of ginger ale. That was it. I felt pretty good. Tired but good. Then less than half an hour after I went to bed last night (my. own. bed. for the first time in over a week) I was in the bathroom paying a sacrifice to the porcelain gods. Delayed motion-sickness? Exhaustion? Ate something bad on the road? Some combination thereof? I don’t know. I just know that instead of being at work this morning I stayed in bed. I know my stomach hurts. I know I’m sick and I don’t blame BlogHer Bola.

  It’s just me. This is how I travel. The time I went to Europe? Less than a week after I got back I had the worst migraine I’d had in more than five years.

  I’ll do it all again next year, possibly twice since we want to do both PEI and BlogHer 10.

  But in the meantime, I don’t suppose anyone wants to make me some soup?

• Frazzled

  Date: 2009.07.18 | Category: Uncategorized | Response: 2

  Lee was golfing with a friend of ours yesterday and our friend asked if I got stressed out about travelling. Lee’s response was that I tend to get “a bit frazzled.” I object!

  See, there are two things I loathe in life – being unprepared and being late. It’s quite possible (and easily possible) to do both while travelling. Ok, ok there’s also that whole control thing. At home I’m rather in control of my surroundings. Way less so when travelling.

  Did you ever notice that your to-do list tends to snowball the closer you get to going on vacation? I have. I worry about what to pack. You see, I used to spend every other weekend with my father and once upon a time he didn’t tell me that we’d be going to a wedding and to say I didn’t have wedding appropriate clothes would be an understatement. So I chronically over-pack. We’re going away for 8 days. That’s a lot of over-packing. I packed a dress. That pretty much means I won’t wear it.

  And then aside from clothes there’s all the other stuff we have to pack like my laptop and business cards and power cords and books and knitting  who knows what else. We haven’t really nailed down what touristy stuff we’re going to do so I’m pretty much prepping for everything.

  Then there’s the whole spending a LOT of hours in the car. Comfy clothes for the win. But there also needs to be things to amuse me. I’m big on amusement when in the car for long periods.

  Then there’s the cleaning out the fridge and packing the cooler. Hey, we’re going to spend ALL day in the car tomorrow. I need snacks. And dammit I just realized we didn’t go to the Bulk Barn. Our snack supply is limited.

  Right now, at this moment, I’m mostly ready to go. I’m mostly packed. We’re making pizza for dinner tonight so we’ll have leftover pizza for breakfast while on the road (breakfast of champions). I’m not feeling frazzled. Not right now.

  Ask me how I feel at 5am tomorrow morning and I might have a different answer.

• Ur Doin It Wrong

  Date: 2009.07.10 | Category: sometimes I ramble | Response: 2

  Whenever I talk about going to BlogHer 09 in Chicago I feel like people want to stick my photo up on lolcats with a “Ur Doin It Wrong” message. Or like they want to stick a “FAIL!” sticker on my forehead.

  What is it that I’m doing? Not a whole heck of a lot and that is what seems to be the opposite of what most people are doing (or what it feels like). Where should I start.

  Clothes and shoes:

  I’m really not worried about what I’m going to wear. Ok, that’s not entirely true because I am but not necessarily for the reasons you might think. As was mentioned in this What To Pack post at Blogher, I am concerned about what to pack. You see, I’m going to be gone for a week – a week in which I’ll be doing very different things. We’re going to be spending about 3 days in a car (1 full day on the way there, two half days on the way back) and that means I need Comfy Clothes but you know, ones appropriate for public viewing. Then Lee and I will be playing tourist for a few days and hanging out with Denise and ThatWoman and whatever members of their family that are around. (And I’m bloody excited about that because I haven’t seen them in six years. I think I might even be more excited about that than the conference.)

  Anyone who has ever played tourist knows that shoes are important because you walk around a lot. Lee and I are particularly stubborn tourists and prefer to walk a city rather than take public transit whenever possible. Even though we’ll have our car we’ll park it somewhere and walk from there. We walked around so much the two weeks we were in Europe that I had to destroy the shoes I wore when I got home. The summer weather here can be summed up as RAIN and because of that I haven’t really gotten all my shoes worn in properly and I’m worried about blisters.What shoes do I pack? I have no idea. So I’ll probably pack way more than I’ll need or wear.

  The conference is at the end of the week and I need to be sure that I have clean clothes left for it (or remember to do some hand-washing or something in the hotel). This all requires planning and I honestly suck in the clothes planning department. I really, really do. Add into that that fact that I’m chronically over pack with items I won’t wear and don’t pack in enough of what I need to wear (except underwear, I always pack oodles of underwear) and yeah, I’m worried about what to pack.

  I can also honestly say I’m not worried about what Tim Gunn or Carson Kressley think about what I’m wearing. I actually had to Google Tim Gunn to figure out who he was. (Hi! I live under a rock! It’s nice and cozy here.)

  What will I be wearing? Like Heather B I’ll be wearing what I wear everyday, which is pretty much the same things I wear into the office. What’s that? Anything from jeans with a studded belt,  an AC/DC t-shirt and a Team Canada hoodie (we’re a rather casual office) to a pencil skirt with a tailored shirt. On my feet you’ll find anything from flip-flips to 3″ red heels. It kinda is going to depend how I feel when I wake up in the morning, what’s clean and how much walking I’m going to do that day. If you see me wandering around the conference hotel late in the evening there’s a good possibility I’ll be wearing a tank top and satin pajama pants.

  I’m also not getting a manicure, pedicure or anything waxed. I will admit that I recently got my hair cut and coloured but I hadn’t had it done since March and I would have gotten it done regardless of whether or not I was going to BlogHer (roots and greys showing and OMG the split ends). I may or may not put on makeup. It depends on my mood when I get up in the morning. I’ll probably wear my glasses rather than contacts because my eyes get too dry when I wear my contacts all day. Plus I just bought new glasses and I’m excited about them. (After years of wearing contacts I’ve pretty much fully embraced a switch back to glasses.)

  Parties:

  I have not RSVP’ed to a single party. And I don’t intend to. Nor have I signed up for any of the other activities like karaoke or bowling (though the bowling does sound like fun). I don’t think there’s anything wrong with the parties and activities. I think they are a great for many people. Just not for me.

  I’m very much an introvert, despite my often chatty online persona. I worked from home for about 3 years and I even now I only work in an office half days. I find large crowds overwhelming and less than fun.

  I attended last year’s, much smaller event, BlogHer Boston. There were about 250 attendees I believe (feel free to correct me in the comments if I’m wrong on that). It was only one day and I found it a bit overwhelming. By the last session of the day I was starting to feel undone and rather than attend it (even though I really wanted to) I hung out in the ballroom at the Geek Lab. I needed the time to chill out.

  BlogHer 09 in Chicago is going to be much, much bigger. I’m absolutely expecting to be completely overwhelmed. I’m attending events that are on the schedule. I’ll  be going to the cocktail party and keynotes. I’m not bowing out of those and I do expect I will enjoy them. And there’s almost always a corner I can hide in. And you absolutely must feel free to come join me in my corner – I’ll be hiding from the crowd, not from people. At the end of the day I’ll be tired and overwhelmed. The last thing I should do put myself into a situation where there are going to be even more crowds.

  Plus, I’m bringing my family. No, I don’t have children but Lee is coming and he is my family.* I would actually like to see him as I rather enjoy spending time with him. He’s even less interested in the parties than I am. (He thinks that y’all are wonderful but en masse you intimidate the pants off him.) We’re not party people. We’re walk along Navy Pier and eat hotdogs or hang out in Denise and ThatWomen’s hotel room and watch What Not To Wear in our pjs people (ok, Lee would rather watch ESPN but we won’t quibble about that).  And again, anyone who wants to join us is welcome.

  I know that I will read about all the parties and I’ll feel a twinge that I missed out on some good times. At the same time I know that it I tried to go that the chances of me having a good time are not as good. I know that whatever I do in the evenings I’ll be having fun and making memories the Sassymonkey way.

  The Conference:

  I have not planned what sessions I’m going to. I haven’t decided if I’m going to go to any of the Room of Your Own sessions. I don’t know if I’m going to do this stream or that stream. Some people don’t plan this at all. Other plan it excessively. I’ll decide when it’s time. There’s probably a decent chance you’ll find me hanging out in the Geek Lab again even though I’m not what I’d call geeky. The Geek Lab is chill and I learn things. That’s part of the reason I go anyway, right?

  So what am I doing?

  I know it seems like I’m not going much of anything to “prepare” for this. It’s not from a lack of enthusiasm. I’ve been around BlogHer since the early days and I’m bloody thrilled to be going. However, I’ve also had the benefit of learning a lot these last few years when I haven’t been able to attend. I know it’s going to be big and overwhelming. I know it’s going to be a ton of fun. I know that not everyone is going to know who I am or want to be my friend. I’m not expecting any of that.

  I’m expecting to go and learn. I’m expecting to be overwhelmed. I’m expecting to meet fantastic, inspirational women. I’m expecting to hang out with friends, be they people I’ve know for years or people I’ve known for five minutes. I’m expecting to bawl my eyes out at the community keynote. I’m expecting to feel like I’m on the world’s craziest, scariest, most thrilling and exciting amusement park. And I’m expecting that the moment it’s over I’m going to be like the child that cries the whole way through and then says, “AGAIN! AGAIN!”

  I’m not going to stress out about it. I’m going to have fun and experience it my way. If that’s doing it wrong, well, doing it right can #suckit.

  *Just a clarification – Lee is not attending the conference. We haven’t figured out what he’ll do to amuse himself on Friday yet but on Saturday he’s going to a Cubbies game.

• The Things We Carry

  Date: 2009.07.06 | Category: sometimes I ramble | Response: 4

  I am incapable of carrying a small bag. I just cannot to it. I spent 6 months searching for a new handbag, trying to find one that was the “perfect” size. I was trying to avoid the big bags that I always get yet still find one big enough for all my stuff and would still sit on my shoulder without falling off.

  I’ve decided that such a bag does not exist. I ended up with another big bag. I like it, a lot, but let me tell you it gets heavy sometimes. And what is it that I need to carry around with me? Stuff.

  Right now in my bag you will find:

  • keys
  • office pass
  • water bottle
  • fruit (I’m in the office, I don’t carry fruit around with me all the time)
  • umbrella
  • chewing gum
  • wallet
  • Sony Reader (lighter than carrying a library book)
  • Burt’s Bees Radiance Lip Shimmer
  • eye drops because I was wearing my contacts the other day
  • MP3 player
  • Mac lipstick
  • a ring (why is that in there?)
  • A 59ml bottle of Hawaiian Tropic 45SPF (*always* have sunscreen with me)
  • 2 microfibre clothes for cleaning my glasses
  • business cards
  • expired bus transfers
  • a pen
  • an Ottawa Farmer’s Market newsletter
  • bus tickets
  • a sweater (it gets cold in the office)

  It’s a pretty typical day. I seem to be unable to carry any less than this, which I guess helps explain why I worry about packing to go away on vacation. If this is what I carry every day can you imagine what I would pack for a week?

  Fess up, what’s in your bag?