Archive for July, 2008
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Why bother?
Dear Internets,
Please explain to me why some people “blog” (I’m using that term very loosely right now) about events but rather than saying anything about it merely copy and paste an entire news article into their post. Or say, “OMG! Did you see this???” First off all, do they not understand copyright law? And why not just link to the darned article? And what’s the freaking point?
A very frustrated,
Sassymonkey
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Doing Penance
Last week L came home after his regular Thursday night card night and I greeted him with the words, “So I’ve been thinking…” For those of you who don’t know me IRL perhaps the only worse words you want to come out of my mouth and directed to you are, “I have a question.” (The second one is particularly troublesome when it comes out on conference calls.)
He got a bit of a deer in headlights look about him and replied, “Ok, let me have it.”
I think proceeded to explain that I thought that perhaps we had gotten a bit too comfortable with our unemployed time. Don’t get me wrong, we’re still applying to jobs like mad. But we also were sleeping in more and more. We were turning into lumps. We’ve been unemployed for almost 5 months. It happens.
So we set up a new little schedule – and it sucks. And I suck even more at following it. The alarm now goes off at 6:45am. We’re supposed to be out of bed by 7. That has not happened yet due to not feeling well yesterday and being damned lazy and liking the soft sheets of bed a bit too much this morning. Ok, fine. So I got up late.No biggie. But also on my schedule it says from 7-7:30am I’m supposed to do yoga.
I made the damn schedule. You would think that I’d follow it but no, no I have not. Again, yesterday I didn’t do it because my stomach was not a happy camper. Me and downward dog were just not going to be jiving. Today I had no excuse for it other than that I was lazy.
So I had to do penance. Penance = the stationary bike. I hate that bloody thing and if I don’t do yoga (minus a legitimate excuse) I am punishing myself with the stationary bike. My morning yoga routine takes approx 22 minutes so I have to do a minimum of 11 minutes of punishment (until that gets too easy and then the time will increase to whatever point I feel like I’m going to die and my legs feel like rubber).
I hate the stationary bike. Hate. it. I may possibly hate the stationary bike even more than an actual bike. You know those kids that would hop on their bikes and just ride for hours and thought it was the best thing ever? I was not one of those kids. I blame my older sister. Her idea of “teaching” me how to ride a bike without training wheels was to put me on it, push me and then laugh when I toppled over and scraped my knees and elbows. Ah sisterly love (our relationship has since matured). I was about 8 when I finally learned and by then figured I was doing just fine on my own two feet thank you very much.
I’m hoping my hatred for the damn bike will result in my doing yoga which I actually want to do. Time will tell.
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Why Do I Blog?
WHY DO YOU BLOG?
That’s a question I’ve been seeing around a lot in the last week after BlogHer 08. And I’ve been pondering it. I’ll think about it as I’m reading a book. I’ll think about it when I’m in the bathroom (what? don’t try to tell you don’t think in there too, I won’t believe it). I’ll think about it when I’m getting ready for bed or watching tv. I’ve been thinking. And the answer is…
I. Don’t. Know.
I know why I started blogging. It was because Cat did it. And because I found other people who blogged. And it was easier to reply to their blogs if I have a sign-in.
And then I started wondering what I wanted to do. Should I stay in Montreal? Or should I quit my job and move to Toronto? I needed a place to write it out…to wonder. Because I didn’t have many people I could talk to about it. I was 25 years old, single, unhappy and I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life.
And then I moved. And I kept blogging. Because I was wondering what I wanted to do and how I was going to do it. Where would I find a job? What kind of job would I find? Oh right and I lived with roomies from hell which was always interesting for the blog (if not enjoyable to live through). And then I found a job. And then I started a book blog because I needed someplace to talk about all these books I was reading. And then I moved out on my own (thank freaking goodness). I was 26 years old, single, happy, and I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life but things were going ok.
And then I was 27 years old, single, and not entirely happy (although my evil vile neighbours had been evicted which greatly improved things). I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life or how I was going to do it. In a less than a day while on vacation in Montreal I decided to move back there. I worked from home so it wouldn’t matter where I lived. I found an apartment in 20 minutes. It was kismet I thought. So I moved back.
And I was 28 years old, single, still not entirely happy and living in Montreal. I loved my apartment. Hated my job. I met a guy but was unsure for a long time. And then I wasn’t. And then I quit my job. And then shit happened. And then that guy moved in. And then we moved to Ottawa.
And now I’m 29 years old, not single, happy, and living in Ottawa. And I don’t know what I want to do with my life or how I’m going to do it. I have no job (am searching). But I have good support behind me – including the people that read this blog and that I only know (or mostly only know) online.
Some of this was blogged openly. Some wasn’t. Somewhere along the line I stopped blogging about stuff. I stopped using this as *my* space. I saw it as an open forum where I had to be guarded. I’m not sure why. Maybe I had seen too many other bloggers get burned. Maybe I was scared. Maybe I wasn’t ready to be questioned about things. Maybe I was afraid to be challenged to look at things. Maybe I was lost and I wasn’t ready to get found.
I’ve never been a naked blogger and I’ll never be fully naked. There will be always be things that don’t get mentioned on this blog. People, names, events. I’ll never be a sex blogger. I’ll probably never be fully open about my relationship on here. Some things are for myself.
But so is this space. And for the last year ok let’s be honest, for a very long time the stuff on this blog has been filler. Not fake but filler. I had veered away from personal blogging. There were times when I’ve struggled to keep up my other blogs.
Maybe I haven’t blogged about my life because I didn’t feel there was much to blog about. But I’ve been thinking about that and I’ve decided that’s bullshit. The bloggers I like most are the ones that blog about themselves, about their experiences. I relate to the personal experience – maybe it’s the anthropologist in me. Maybe I’ve always been more comfortable to be the reader and not the writer.
Maybe I’m scared.
Maybe I’m scared to take myself seriously. Because then I’ll have to be accountable for things. Maybe I’m scared to figure out what it is that I want to do because I’ll discover that I’ve gone about it the wrong damn way (honestly it usually is the path I take…). Maybe I was so focused on getting an education I never stopped to think about what life would be like after or what I wanted to do after because I never thought I’d make it that far. And then when I did I was scared to ask for more.
When people ask me what I want to be when I grow up I throw out the flippant answer – taller. It distracts them, it throws them off. They forget that they might have been asking a real question. It works.
I don’t know what I want to be. Or who I’m going to be. Right now I’m just me. And that’s damn fine.
Why do I not blog? Because I’m on a journey, I don’t have a map, I don’t know where I’m going or where I want to go. I’m just trying to avoid the quicksand, marshes and mountains. Why should I blog? Because I’m on a journey, I don’t have a map, I don’t know where I’m going or where I want to go and I need to figure it out. But maybe someone else has a compass and can help me out.
Why do I blog? Because I’m on a journey. And I’m hoping you’ll will be a friend and co-adventurer along the way (and maybe you have a compass or know a shortcut).
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Things I’ve Done Instead of Being at BlogHer 08
Yeah so lots of wonderful people I know are at BlogHer this weekend. I am not. This is what I’ve done done instead.
- soaked my foot in cold water about 5 times at day to make it stop itching
- I’ve not popped the blisters on my toes even though they are the size of a jelly bean
- fell asleep in bed while watching Back to the Future
- read lots of posts by people who are at BlogHer
- went to Costco and bought toilet paper and books (the necessities of life)
- tossed my jalapeno plant because it was infested with aphids again
- knit
My weekend has been way more fun than if I was in San Francisco….(maybe?)
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I have no shoes to wear
Seriously. I have a lot of shoes and I don’t have a single freaking pair that can fit on my foot right now. I barely managed to get a pair of flipflops on today so we could run errands (why yes the library is an important errand, I need books as was Costco because we needed toilet paper…and books). I limped my way through the stores and library hoping two things. The first being that no one would step on my foot and I’m happy to report that it did not happen. If it did you might have read about a death at an Ottawa Costco because had someone stepped on my foot I think I would have passed out from the pain and whacked my head on the cement floor. Ok, so it more likely would have gotten a concussion but I’ve had one before and it’s so not fun (it is however an amusing story…).
The second wish was that no one would look at my foot. I think this was accomplished since no one looked at me and screeched. Again, trust me on that. It’s hideous. We took a photo of it earlier today and it’s gotten even nastier looking since then. I like you all too much to post pictures of it (I suspect Kit-Cat would never speak to me again if I did…).
So I’m stuck in the house all weekend because I can’t wear shoes. Good thing I took that library trip so I have books to keep me company.
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Itchy and Scratchy
It all started on Sunday with an itchy big toe. By Monday evening I had a rash on 4 of the toes on my right foot. Yep. Hives. My wonderful hypersensitive to who knows what skin revolts against me once again (at least there was no wax or um…”sensitive bits” involved this time). So 10:30pm found me cruising the aisles of my local Shoppers looking for Benadryl (pills and topical). Both items secured I was positive that all would be well in a day or two.
Fast foward to Wednesday evening when the hives have progressed to blisters and the application of the Benadryl cream caused shooting pains in my foot and I all but tore out my hair. Time for a doctor’s visit don’t you think?
There’s only a slight issue there as I still have out of province health care. Despite the fact that I can get an Ontario driver’s license in less than a month it takes 3 months before I can get an Ontario health card. Which means that any medical services costs bucks. It’s really not that much (particularly in comparison to the US) but it still sucks and I have that lovely “I’m out of a job and shouldn’t be doing this” mentality that I need to boot myself out of. After much prodding and poking and internet searching for just exactly how bad a case of hives I really have I forced myself to go to a clinic. Because apparently when your hives turn into blisters it just may be something that you need to have checked out by a medical professional and not Dr. Google.
And you know the SHOOTING PAIN every time you accidentally wiggle a toe or something brushes against it had nothing to do with my decision either.
So off to the clinic I went and had a blessedly short wait only to have the doctor spend less than 2 minutes with me and write me a prescription. He also all but backed away from my toes while crossing his fingers in front of him to ward him off from the evilness that is my hives.
I couldn’t get the prescription filled right away so I stopped back at the pharmacy after an Ottawa tweetup (which hello, was difficult enough for an introvert like me, I’d totally die from having to be social if I were at BlogHer). I get home and read the label to see this:
“Typically, it is used for inflammation and itching or for hemorrhoids. It requires several days to take effect.”
Right… so not only do I have medication for my hives that is typically used for hemorrhoids but it will not produce effects any time soon. I’m thinking that as sucky and painful as hives on your toes can be (and trust me, I’m limping all over the place and they are forming on the other foot now) I really got off easy. Because having to wait days for hemorrhoid relief? That’s a whole other level of suckitude.
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Vacation Recap Part 3 – the end
On Monday we headed to Charlottetown because Collective Soul and the Tragically Hip were playing that night. We had bought our tickets months ago. We had to pick up our tickets and there a few things that I wanted to do in town…like go to the Paderno Factory store outlet. So we did some shopping, ate lunch at the Merchant Man Pub and I bought a pot at Paderno that I love. AND I got to have yummy Cow’s ice-cream.Then it was to my best friend’s place for dinner (bbq, yummy) and then we all headed off to the concert. C and her husband had been there the last few nights (it was a three night concert series) and had scoped out a good spot. It was to the right of the stage and you could still see pretty much everything but it really wasn’t at all crowded. It was, and this is very important, on the side opposite the beer tent. And for extra entertainment we were standing near where people who had done stupid things were getting escorted out. Good times!
The next day was Canada Day and we decided we wanted to keep it quiet. So we picked up my mother and took her to my town’s museum. Admission was free over the weekend so we got to look through stuff (they have binders full of family histories, etc) and then we headed to the beach. I told L that the water was cold but he either didn’t believe me or didn’t care because he jumped right in. He discovered that Yes! Yes it is cold. Verrrry cold.
Sucker.
Then we wandered along the beach walking all the way down to the end where the lighthouse is. It was low tide so it made for good exploring. I found a bunch of live sand dollars (which I left, trust me you don’t want to collect those – STINKY) but one that was dead and dried out enough to take home. Mom and I showed L how crabs bury themselves during low tide. We showed him which jellyfish to avoid because they’ll sting you (we probably should have show these to him before he jumped in the water come to think of it). We found bar clams and even a wee little hermit crab. It was fun. I love the beach.
We dropped mom off and went to C’s parents place for a dip in their pool and then dinner. And then we went and picked up mom and waited for the fireworks to start. And waited. And waited. And waited. Almost 20 minutes after they were supposed to start they finally did and lasted a whole 10 minutes! Woohoo! I love small towns.
And then we got up the next day and drove to New Brunswick. But we had a mission before we left – to find me some Lime Rickey. We looked in every store we had stopped at but nadda. Nothing. Then right before the bridge there is one last convenience store and they had it. I bought 6 bottles.
Long drive through New Brunswick with a stop in Fredericton for a late lunch and was able to see Deby of the comments for a few minutes. Stayed overnight in a B&B in Edmunston (nice place, nice room, kinda want the bathroom that we had to be my real bathroom). Up the next day and a long drive through Quebec without stopping for lunch and then we were home at dinner time.
And then I slept for two days because I was exhausted from all that vacationing. And that’s the end of the trip and I can blog about something else now.
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Vacation Recap Part 2
You notice how I posted part one about a week ago? And then it was total silence? Well you see, I really meant to post the rest of the vacation story quickly. And then I didn’t. And then there were these other things that I wanted to post but I didn’t want to post those without posting about the rest of the vacation first but then I didn’t so there was absolutely no posting.
Coincidentally, I do this a lot. If I have a post in my head planned but I haven’t written it I’ll not post something else that I want to post but then I never so write that post and the next thing I know that it’s been three weeks or something. Oops.
Right so we had gotten to the rental office on time and then got to explore our vast room with it’s teeny tiny table, pull out sofa, queen sized bed and tiny kitchenette.Oh and the bathroom.
Now, I liked the room. I really did. But someone day someone is going to explain the logic to me of having a big ass room that contains everything and why the heck they had to put the “kitchen” at the foot of the bed.
Also as some of you are aware, PEI has a crazy-ass recycling and compost program. So there’s waste and recycling and compost but it’s more complicated than that because there are these weird exceptions and such. Rhe place we were staying had all the proper containers but no notice of what goes where. So we guessed. Hopefully we were right. If not, sorry PEI for messing up your environmental thing (oh wait, you already did that this year when you lifted the can ban).
Since we had gotten in so late we went over to my mother’s for breakfast (I gave my mother permission to take the day off since I was only home for four days, lol). And then talk turned to lobster. At first we thought that we’d be able to pick them up at my uncle’s place but since it was the same day they started taking in traps we ended up going down to the wharf. Now I’ve spent a heck of a lot of time down there from the time I was the kid and my grandfather used to take me there to when I worked there in the now abandoned fish plant. But to my landlubber boyfriend it was all completely new. So in between meeting various relatives he took lots of photos (not a usual undertaking down there).Then on the way home we stopped by the beach for a few minutes to take a few pictures.
We headed home to my mother’s we went where we promptly put them to death in vats of boiling hot water. And then we massacred them and ate them. They were delicious! L had never held a lobster so before we cooked them we had him hold one. And then we made him hold a cook one. And then we make him learn how to take it apart so he could eat it. In my family we don’t do that thing where we sit down and everyone takes one or two lobster and that’s what they eat. Quite simply our refrigerator isn’t big enough to store the lobsters (plus lobsters in the shell stink up the fridge). Instead we clean them all at once (with a few nibbles here and there) and then we eat them without having to worry about cleaning them.
After filling out bellies we ended up going out that night with my sister. I got to show L a night out in my home town. We didn’t quite paint the town red but there’s not much to really paint. And um, I don’t know anyone in my home town anymore aside from people I’m related to (that’s what leaving right after high school will do).
The next day we took my mother to Charlottetown so she could so some shopping. This whole shopping on Sunday thing in PEI is still pretty new. But we got all of her shopping done even if she is as stubborn as a mule and wouldn’t let us buy her anything. (What’s that you say, stubborn is a family trait? I have no idea what you are talking about?)
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Vacation Recap Part 1
Sans pictures because I don’t have all of them downloaded yet and none are actually on my computer yet. Oops!
New Brunswick Part 1
Vacation started at 4:20am. That part sucked. An hour later we were pulling out of the parking lot of Tim Horton’s starting our drive to St. John, NB. That was the first of many Tim Horton’s. And this may get me kicked out of Canada but I’m bloody sick of Tim Horton’s. When you stop at one every couple of hours and go inside (Tim’s usually has pretty clean bathrooms – just an FYI if you are ever driving across Canada) the donuts and food start to look really disgusting after awhile. And we really didn’t eat any of it (actually I didn’t eat any of it, L might have bought a muffin or two along the way). But I don’t want to step into Timmy’s for quite awhile. We stopped somewhere in Quebec for gas. And then at a Normandin for lunch. I dislike Normandin’s. It’s not so much that their food isn’t good (it’s not bad, but I sure wouldn’t go out of my way to stop at one) but it’s the only restaurant that the bus used to stop at between Moncton and Montreal and that Normandin’s really wasn’t very good and just blah. Had we been able to wait an hour or two we could have stopped at an Irving Big Stop which would have been far better.Should you ever find yourself driving east from central Canada here’s another tip – the 90ish km between Rivière du-Loup (hint: don’t pronounce the “p”) and New Brunswick are lonnnngggggg. Really long. Longer than long.
And then you get into New Brunswick and it’s new divided highways and you will be bored. The highways are great. Really. But boring as hell. From the time you past Edmunston to the time you hit Fredericton the scenery will not change. WILL NOT CHANGE. There will be trees, you’ll occasionally go across a bridge-like thing over a ravine (which may or may not go over water, you won’t be able to tell), and by big pieces of rock. And that’s it. Shake, rinse and repeat and that’s most of the New Brunswick highway. When you’ve been awake since 4:20am Eastern and it’s 3 or 4pm Atlantic and are hopped up on caffeine (too many Tim’s plus and energy drink) and don’t want to read because you highly suspect that if you try you will get queasy (you are probably right) this is the part of the drive where you will be bouncing off the walls and go a wee bit loopy. Or loony. Or just plain nuts. Eventually I downloaded a game onto my cell phone, not caring about the $7 charge, and used that to amuse myself for an hour. It was worth the $7 (something that L will agree with, I was scaring him).
The highway from Fredericton to Saint John was pretty darned unscenic too. But it goes through CFB Gagetown’s training areas so you can make up stories about what kind of things are hidden in there and what kind of things could befall someone who decided to take a wander through there (erm…once they got past the fence). Oh, and watch out for moose. Moose + car = BAD.
Then you hit Saint John and it will surprise you. Why? It’s an industrial town and it looks industrial. When you first drive in to it you see Industry. Once you are in the town, particularly the downtown, it’s not a bad little place. Some nice old buildings. Some hills that come close to rivalling the one I used to live on. But we weren’t there for the scenery. We were there to meet people. We checked into our B&B (Carleton House Bed and Breakfast – it was fantastic – highly recommend it). Then it was off to Churchill’s Pub (which doesn’t not have a website…surprising) to meet up with people that we used to work with. It was actually the first time I had met any of them face-to-face. It was great! We chatted for a bit, ate, and then parted ways. We went back to the B&B and promptly fell asleep.
The next day we got up and had a fantastic breakfast (pumpkin spice pancakes…I must play with this idea) and then hit the road to go visit someone else that we used to work with. But we went to their cottage which involved a couple of ferries. Just wee little ferries, not like the big ones that I’m used to. Their cottage is really neat. Propane stove, fridge and water heater. All electricity is provided via solar power. Composting sewage system. Very neat.
Then it was time to head to PEI. We hit the road a wee bit later than we would have liked. I started getting a bit stressed out because I wanted to get “home” in time to see my mother before we checked in. And eat. So we pushed on, stopping only for gas, and you guessed it – Tim Horton’s. Thankfully the highway views improved a bit giving us an occasional glimpse of something other than trees and rock. By the time we hit the bridge it was rainy and hazy and the view wasn’t much to see. We’ve both been over the Confederation Bridge before (me many more times than L). For me the disappointment over that wasn’t so much about not being able to see the bridge as much as it impeded the view of home.
On a clear day as you go across the bridge you honestly won’t see much anyway, particularly if you are in a car (low vehicles really don’t get a view). But there’s this one spot, at the center of the bridge where it is taller and from there you see it. The jagged red shore of Prince Edward Island. And you open the window and smell the salt in the air. From there the shore gets closer and closer, larger and larger, and then finally you are off the bridge and you are home.
That’s one of the nice things about the Island. It’s not merely a border sign on the highway as you enter. You have to make an effort to go there and when you arrive you know you’ve arrived. Be it the transition from bridge to highway or the clanking of the ramps as you drive off the ferry you know the moment that you’ve arrived.
A quick stop for gas and to switch drivers (I did some of the driving in PEI and this was the first time I was behing the wheel of a car in 2 years) and we were on our way through PEI. L was amused because he’s rarely in the passenger seat of his own truck and he’d also never driven with me before. Our destination was closer than I remember it being. It used to always seem so far way from the bridge. But I guess everything is relative and after the long drive we had just done it was as if it was merely across the street. We made a quick stop at the local drive in restaurant to pick up some grub (gotta love a place where you can still get a cheeseburger platter for less than $4) and then on to my mother’s. We stopped in for a bit to eat, say hi, drop off some gifts and make plans for the next day. We made it to our cottage 4 minutes before the office closed. But we made it.
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101 Things Update
I’m home from vacation and bloody tired. But it’s time for another 101 things update.
Completed items:
18. Go to PEI to visit my family
19. Visit Calleen (When I started this she was not living in PEI but now she is which made it way easier…even if she hadn’t been we would have stopped to visit her anyway).
25. Take things to Goodwill x6 (Note: or other similar donation place) – I had two remaining on this one and we made at least 2 trips in June…if not more.
30. Plant a garden (seriously) x1 (Note – slight change on this since I can’t do a garden – get a plant and keep it alive for at least a month) – Planted tomatoes and a jalapeno pepper plant. My “patio tomatoes” – yeah, I think the wrong label was put into those as they have grown to be HUGE plants. Two of the plants had to be moved outside due to an extreme aphid invasion. The remaining tomato plant has lots of buds on it so I’m hopeful. Ditto the pepper plant. They have been kept alive for a month. Woohoo! Had to move the herbs outside too though due to the aphids…I think we might be able to salvage the rosemary though. And will restart some basil and cilantro soon.
I was going to try not to buy any books in July (#4 on my list – don’t buy any books for a month x4) but I sank that one on the very first day of the month. It’s only kinda my fault. You see, my hometown has a museum and it turns 50 this year. So it put out a book with lots of pictures and stories about the local community. One of my relative’s picture is in it. And well, it’s just darned interesting. So I bought it. And I bought another book about the area that was written by one of my high school English teachers back in the ’80s. Totally justifiable but oh well, there’s always August (although that means I couldn’t buy Meyer’s new book until September…unless I preorder…).
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